Afterthoughts of Commencement 2005

A year ago, I was worried that I cannot find a permanent job.
A year ago, everything seems blur and yet hopeful.
A year ago, I was just enjoying my own commencement ...

Today, I am congratulating my friends' graduation.
Today, I am holding a permanent job.
Today, I am asking around how's the job market ...

And the job market seems even better than before.
And the job offers sounds even more lucrative.
And I wonder about the job I am holding ...

Then I was thinking how time flies.
Then I was wondering how much I have accomplished.
Then I was finding what are my life goals ...

I came to conclude that I should find my path soon.
I came to decide that whatever decisions I made will affect my future.
I came to realise that I am lost ...

If only work does not sap my energy.
If only I am more clear-headed.
If only my guardian angel can light a candle for me ...

All is not lost though.
All over the world, I am not the only lost sheep.
All around me, I can still feel life's fervour ...

THE SECRET GARDEN ACT I
IT'S A MAZE


BEN
Plant a hedge, cut it back
Dig a hole, try to fill it
Plant a rose, tie it back
Find a mole, try to kill it

It's a maze, this garden, it's a maze of ways
Any man can spend his day
It's a maze, this garden, it's a maze of paths
But a soul can find the way

For an old man knows, how a year it goes
How the cold hard ground in the spring comes 'round
How the seeds take hold and the ferns unfold
How an English garden grows

MARY
Skip, skipped the ladies to the master's gate
Sip, sipped the ladies while the master ate
Tip, toed the chambermaids and stole their pearls
Snip, snipped the gardener and cut off their curls

DICKON
Come along, love, come fly away, fly along
Come along, fly away home
Come along, love, you've come a long way
You've flown all the day, come fly away home

BEN
Miss a step, trip and fall
Miss the path, meet the wall
Miss the way, miss a turn
Gettin' lost's how you learn

It's a maze, this garden, it's a maze of paths
Meant to lead a man astray
Take a left, and then, turning left again's
How the soul can find the way

For an old man knows, how a year it goes
How the cold hard ground in the spring comes 'round
How in time it shows how a garden grows
How an English garden grows
How the roses climb
How sublime the time
When an English garden grows

The long bus journey

Recently I was taking a long bus journey from the east to the west, and was appreciating the scenery the bus takes me too. In this almost 2 hours trip, I actually felt peace with myself. Something I haven't felt for a long time. I become more aware of my surrounding. And I was brought back to my past... where I used to encounter such feelings too...

When I was studying pursuing for my Degree, I used to travel long MRT trips to attend classes. Those days, if classes started at 8am sharp, I would be trying to catch the 6.30am train.

And when lessons end at 6pm, to avoid the rush hour, I would rather stay in school till 9pm and take the pretty empty home bound train.

I never fancy the morning trains. They were bustling with activity, packed and crowded. To me it seems like a blur of events, with goggy pandas lacked of sleep trying to survie in this rat race. All the rushing, the pushings to get on the train to cut down many one-tenth seconds, and not so that they could reach their destination early, but to maintain their pace and get on time. Makes me wonder what is the use of rushing. (Of course don't rush means late. But with so many people late with you, are you really late or is it just ur Kiasuism antics at work?)

On the other hand, I miss the night trains terribly. During that time, it seems very peaceful. The scenery is pitch black and felt as if the surrounding have finally quietened down and be back its calm state. And my heart calmed and slowed down with it too. Suddenly I am able to listen to what my heart wants to tell me, able to observe the miracle of mother nature, able to appreciate life as it is. There are times where I might be so tired I just knocked off, but those were also the times that I have pleasant and peaceful sleep, not those fitful types which I might take while on the morning trains.

In future, if my head is ever muddled up, I think I should once again take a long journey to somewhere, and enjoy the peace that the journey gives me. Somehow I remember reading that in life, it is not the destination but the journey that matters.

In love aspects, where you go doesn't really matter. What matters is your lover was accompanying you to it. If you had gone to the most heavenly place alone, you still will not enjoy it.

In education, there is never a definite destination to end. You learn as you live. Every day, you gain abit of knowledge. You travel further in this education lifelong journey.

And in life, it doesn't matter what will I end up becoming so long I had cherish and enjoy every aspects of my life journey that I had been going through. May it be sweet or bitter, as long as it is my journey, I should appreciate whatever comes to me.

Overwritten Files and Lousy Mood

Judging the time I am still writing this post... it only means that I am still grieving for the overwritten files...

Sighz why didn't I take some forensics crash course. I have tried so many programs to recover the files but to no avail. Makes me wonder how did my computer save new data...

Blame my camera for resetting its counter. Many a times I had almost overwritten my photos. But each time, I manage to prevent the "tragedy" from happening. Yet why did such event happen yesterday. And the consequences were quite...

If it had been personal photos, I wouldn't feel so sad. But they were photos of my cousin's wedding day event. And the day activities were in one click overwritten by the night activities at my own carelessness. How to account to the hundreds of people who were being taken by this camera. Ok I am exagerrating. But I still feel sadz.

Does anybody out there have a way to recover overwritten files? Files that were overwritten due to the same file name? I was told NTFS never re-use data area unless lack of space. I have lots of space in my computer. Yet it seems to have overwrite the exact same area that I am trying to recover.

1 day has passed. Doubt there will be any miracle... sighz

Search for the Afghan Girl

Was reading my friend's blog when I chanced upon this blog. Out of curiosity, I went to read the article. Maybe is because I know somewhere in my house, I seem to have this article...

After reading the article, I felt a tinge of sadness ...

It is indeed heart-warming to know that this girl did find happiness in the end. Even though life is still poor and hard, but at least she has the courage to perserve all hardship that has been allocated to her. The fiery in her eyes might have flickered after so many years of hardship, but she still exudes her indomitable sense.

All these makes me wonder, how much of stubborness, of strength do I possess to go through my own life's lot?

Night Rainbow / Lunar Rainbow / Moonbow

I gathered all these info on 12th Apr 2005... and yet when i finally managed to post it.. it is 19th June 2005.. time sure flies...

Makes me wonder when I see the night rainbow, how old am i already? Wait... first I must figure out if I ever get to see the night rainbow... =(

Anyway I had an interest in Night Rainbow after a certain HK TV Serial...

I wonder if rainbow at night is colourful? Or is it white? Is it created due to the sunlight? Or due to moonlight?

Read from an article that moon can produce rainbows too since all it takes is a mass of water droplets and a light source. This lunar rainbow is very faint, thus you might not be able to see the colours as we can only see colours if the light is bright enough.

Wah... I think if I can catch a lunar white rainbow would be nice too...

But then... from ancient times in Hawaii, it was believed that "the rainbow of night" is the highest blessing. And to be able to have this highest blessing.. wah I think lots of time and effort must be put in.

Moonbow sounds very musical right. Too bad I can't find any nice song with that word. Somehow I just can't find the perfect song to round up this post. No wonder why this post takes so many months to generate haha.

CommunicAsia 2005

I used to hear alot of hoo-ha about this exhibition when I was studying... and had always been interested to go.. so pretty elated when I got a chance to go because SSPL has a booth which a batch of us take turns to 'look after'.

The whole day in Expo was a super eye-opening experience for me. I never expect so many foreigners coming to the exhibition, some with their luggages, others is full suits. I mean here is Singapore, burning like fire, and these people were so dressed up. Shows how much they value this exhibit.

Saw alot of fanciful phones too! Some guy told me that in the past used to be the telecommunications that rule the exhibit, but this year it is very obvious that the phone companies that are the big shot. You can see how big Ericsson, Motorola, Samsung, LG, Panasonic booths were... There was even one China phone company... started with 'H'. Can't remember already. And the models they hired were all of standard one =D

The scary thing is mealtimes. No matter how late you go for your meals, you will forever see a crowd of people trying to settle their meals too. Imagine if Expo did not just open their food courts 2 months or so ago. But I was told that in the past, for big events, they will have make shift food stalls too. As everybody knows, Expo used to have only BK as their eatery. Imagine everybody eating at BK in the past, you can roughly speculate how much BK has been earning those few years.

In short it had been a worthwhile experience. Knew alot of Malaysia companies too.

Ai Qing 886

I just realised that epi 2 has Rain&Tear scene in it. Gosh, when I saw them 'Acting' the scene out, I immediately went to re-watch Rain&Tear Epi 5. That part was the female lead teaching her friend to Let Go. Re-watching it, I can still feel the turmoil when you Let Go.

Anyway the whole show has completed. And it does have a happy ending. I find this story abit like eternal sunshine of the spotless mind with all the removing memories technology. In that show, the conclusion is the person who you wishes to forget is the ONE. In this show, the conclusion is whether the memories are bitter or sweet, they are there to play a part in your growing up and understanding of mankind. Thus it should not easily removed at a zap.

Hmm does that mean we should never invent or drink "Wang Qing Shui" hee hee...

給我一杯忘情水　換我一生不傷悲
就算我會喝醉　就算我會心碎
不會看見我流淚

Actually I think sometimes some memories are best forgotten else it will impedes your pace to a brighter future... but i emphasis only SOME rare memories.

Sigmund Freud's Word of Wisdom

Saw this line in Wisely's blog,

When a man thinks a thing, the thing he thinks is not the thing but the thing he thinks he thinks.
By Sigmund Freud


At one glance, one might not understand what this really meant. Actually it is a very simple logic and by replacing words, one might be able to understand better.

E.g. I prefer to use 'Woman' and 'Love' to decipher so I came up with this line :

When a woman loves a thing, the thing she loves is not the thing but the thing she thinks she love

To conclude, what feelings we have, what thinkings we have is actually what we perceive only. That is why sometimes one will ask oneself, Do I really love you or Do I just think that I love you or Do I just love the feeling of loving you, or Do I just love the feeling of love or....

There is so many versions of life, you just have to choose one. Choose more and you end up muddling your life.

p/s : Sighz I still cannot find the blog on Wisely and her little girl fren =(
And I am still finding about Night Rainbow. Found some information already. Maybe will publish the blog some day.

A Friend's Poem

I decided to peek at Wisely's blog today and see what will catch my eyes. To tell the truth, this is the first time my eyes set sight on her blog because the first time I went in, only my ears were captivated by her background music. Unfortunately I can't remember what music it was haha.

Anyway her poem caught my attention. Those interested can follow the link to her poem. (I cannot copy it because it is copyrighted to her already and any reproduction will render me in trouble "p )

After reading it, I ended up thinking of the 2nd part of this poem instead of working (shhh....) So here it is :

她终于转身离开这伤心地
他终于觉察她那憔悴的背影

她的心 在每一步伐 碎一片
他的思 在她每步離去 強一点

她決定转身默记他与笛子的影子
他決定向前接收她与笛子的伴奏

If got any wrong words or better words, please comment kies. I have to admit that though I like to change lyrics, but my writing style (especially in chinese) is never up to standard

Over The Rainbow - Lyrics

I got stuck in a HongKong TVB series - "Fate Twisters" aka "Hei Ye Cai Hong" (which means Night Rainbow)

Always like Ada Choi, this is no exception. I know the story is a very typical storyline of 2 person from enemy to lover, and who has to overcome lots of obstacles + sacrifices to be together. But I like it maybe because they are just that simple. I wish there are times I can be naive and simple and contented with my lot but then I guess it is no longer possible. I always feel that innocence is inversely proportional with knowledge, the more I know, the less innocent I am. Although in this show, I think is hinting that money is inversely proportional with innocence. As what the character Amy Lin says, "If she has a rich father who can give her everything, maybe she might be as innocent as Joey"

Anyway I am still thinking, is there really rainbow at night?????

p/s : I never knew that mp3 can be stream this way.. wooo I'm so happy. Now I only have one problem, what is the song title?? haha. I know the singer is Su Yong Kang (if I wasn't mistaken "p)

Here's the lyrics for their "love song". As usual HK TV series always will have abit of English influence (& japanese influence esp the word "obasan"). This song is originally for The Wizard of OZ. Very nice story!!

Over The Rainbow
(Arlen-Harburg)
--------------------------------------------------------

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true

Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?