Nothing happens but first a dream

Source:
A Slice of Life by Eugene Loh - "Running Toward Your Best"
A Slice of Life by Eugene Loh - "Using discontentment for self-development"
Joy Movie

Eugene Loh started of saying everyone wants a better life. Of course the definition of better life is entirely subjective. But most people who dream, do not believe their dreams can actually come true.

Like The Alchemist, most people will just forget their dreams, especially their childhood dreams. We have been conditioned to think that the present lot is the best we're ever going to have, and venturing out is dangerous. I wonder if it is only the Singaporean who will have such thoughts having been spoon-fed by the government for the entire life. At least I felt I had been.

So he quoted Helen Keller words, "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." And goes on saying the following:

Do you really want to sit at that desk ten hours a day, typing till your wrists and back ache? Do you really want to continue accepting lowly assignments from a supervisor who bears a grudge against you? Do you really want to carry your talents and love to the grave?

Every one of us possesses a skill that is vulnerable. Almost any hobby can be turned into a business. And if you note every idea that pops into your head, no matter how common or silly at the time, you'll realize that if you had the gumption to develop them, you could be the next entrepreneur du jour!

Opportunities are out there. Even if you think you haven't a shred of talent, which I doubt, simple hard work and determination to succeed will get you places you never dreamed you could reach. But before all that can happen, you must make up your mind to step out and grab your share of life.

It may seem frightening to step out. But this fear lasts only a while. The comfort of conformity soon pales in comparison to the empowerment, passion and excitement that come with any bold, new purposeful action.

I typed and shared this out with only one purpose; that hopefully CL will read it. Seriously I have constantly told her many times my thoughts and she has constantly reminded me her fears. As it has become a vicious cycle, most of the times I no longer want to dwell with the situation nor repeat saying what she already knows. It gets too tiresome and if I were to follow what Anthony Robbins taught, then one has to drop off pessimistic friends to be able to go further. Of course pessimistic and optimistic are two sides of a coin. I can sway from one extreme to another, so can all my friends. And if my friends have a potential to sway to the optimism sometimes, it doesn't hurt to stretch a helping hand. A big IF though.

As what American essayist and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote: “It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life, that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.” So in a way Anthony Robbins isn't wrong because if your friends are helping themselves, then the reason of forsaking them would cease to exist. But if your friend refused to be helped, then no amount of help on your part will be able to change anything. For that, then I would definitely conserve my energy and move on because I sincerely believed that there is so much more I can do.

After all like the opening of the Joy Movie says

Life can be complicated, but..
Happiness is really pretty simple

I once quoted from this movie
And I would like to re-iterate certain quotes relevant to this post.

Change your thoughts and change your world
Norman Vincent Peale

Nothing happens but first a dream
Carl Sandburg

Sometimes in the winds of change we find our true direction

Throw your heart over the fence
And the rest will follow.
Norman Vincent Peale

Courage does not always roar.
Sometimes it is quiet voice at the end of the day, saying... "I will try again tomorrow."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The only things that stand between a person and what they want in life are the will to try it, and the faith to believe it's possible.
- Rich Devos

It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny.
- Jean Nidetch

Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
- Will Rogers

So to me, to CL and to the rest who do have dreams, I wish you have the courage, the quiet voice to spur you on before you get run over.

Like the last line in "Using discontentment for self-development" - If you're unhappy about your condition, change it! Strive to find fulfillment. Don't envy others. Make yourself worthy of envy!

又寂寞又美好

Source: Kanunu
Source: Jimmy

本书是幾米生病后、成名前的创作集结。

梁靜茹 - 沒有如果/愛情之所以為愛情

沒有如果 - 梁靜茹
（敗犬女王主題曲）

詞／曲：嚴爵
編曲：嚴爵　朱敬然

如果我說　愛我沒有如果
錯過就過你是不是會難過
若如果拿來當藉口　那愛是不是有一點弱

如果我說愛沒有如果　真的愛我就放手一搏
還想什麼 還怕什麼　快牽起我的手

有人說　世界上最遙遠的距離不是生與死
而是我就站在你面前　你卻不知道我愛你

我常說　如果人類連愛一個人都被自己綁住
那世界末日已來到　不需要等到地球毀滅掉的那天

如果我說　愛我沒有如果
錯過就過你是不是會難過
若如果拿來當藉口　那愛是不是有一點弱

如果我說愛沒有如果　真的愛我就放手一搏
還想什麼 還怕什麼　快牽起我的手

別怕太快樂　別怕失去我
Da la da la~~



When Fish Leong first sung this song, I especially love these 2 stanzas...
有人說　世界上最遙遠的距離不是生與死
而是我就站在你面前　你卻不知道我愛你

我常說　如果人類連愛一個人都被自己綁住
那世界末日已來到　不需要等到地球毀滅掉的那天

I actually remmebered asking a few people about it.. especially this line "如果人類連愛一個人都被自己綁住"... but I think I did not blog about it.

Anyway there is another song by Fish Leong too

愛情之所以為愛情

《敗犬女王-片尾曲》
作詞：黃婷　作曲：周谷淳

買CD　把你的聲音丟在角落
看電影　到結局總是配角的錯
你要的故事　讓你去說
我要的生活　我好好過

寫日記　寫不出是誰的感受
夜空裡　每個人佔有一個星座
你到底懂不懂　我只要一點溫熱的觸碰
你到底懂不懂　有些話　並不是 一定要說

你總說愛情之所以為愛情　是用來揮霍
你總是漫不在乎　當我看著自己的稀薄
你編織的感覺難以捉摸
你比我的夢境還困惑

我看見愛情之所以為愛情　誰都在揮霍
我想的天長地久　也許只是時間的荒謬
我沈迷的感動與你不同
我的瞭解讓我自由

一場雨　有時候下得不是時候
就像你　說難過不是真的難過
你到底懂不懂　我只要一個安穩的等候
你到底懂不懂　想你想得好像　空氣都停了

Why most people fail?

Source: Email

1. Lack of Persistence
The total secret of success lies in two words, persistence and resistance. Persist in what must be done and resist what ought not to be done.

2. Lack of Conviction
People without conviction do not take a stand. They go along to get along because they lack confidence and courage. They conform in order to get accepted even when they know that what they are doing is wrong. They behave like part of a herd.

3. Rationalizing
Losers always have a book full of excuses to tell you why they could not.

4. Not learning from past mistakes
Failure is a detour, not a dead end. It is a delay, not a defeat. Experience is the name we give to our mistakes.

5. Lack of Discipline
Discipline takes self-control, sacrifice, and avoiding distractions and temptations. It means staying focused.

6. Poor self-esteem
Poor self-esteem is a lack of self-respect and self-worth. It leads to abuse of one's self and others. People with low self-esteem are constantly looking for identity. They are trying to find themselves. One's self is not to be found but to be created.

7. Fatalistic attitude
Fatalistic attitude prevents people from accepting responsibility for their position in life. They attribute success and failure to luck. They resign themselves to their fate. They believe and accept the predestined future written in their horoscope or stars, that regardless of their effort whatever has to happen will happen. Hence they never put in any effort and complacency becomes a way of life. They wait for things to happen rather than make them happen.

Bflygal's comments: I never knew I had fatalistic attitude hahaha... Just before typing this post, I actually lost another post due to some error... supposedly was a collation of all those advertisements I watched esp on Nick Vujicic "Are you going to finish strong". Which I actually watched before but it still never fails to amaze me.. it never fails to make me tearful.. it never fails to reminds me that even with my fatalistic attitude, I always believed that GA loves me and will guide me.



Source: Youtube

Someitmes in life when you fall down
you don't have the strength to get back up...

If I fail and I give up, do you think I am ever going to give up,
If I fail I try again, and again, and again...
It matters how you're going to finish
Are you going to finish strong?
You will find strength to get back up....

Lately I am really grateful that I meet people who share with me their conviction towards life. Even after so much downhills, after reaching one rock bottom to another, but my friend never give up trying to succeed. It is depressing though.. even Nick Vujicic felt depressed at times. But you have to keep motivating yourself, you have to keep believing in your ideals and goals. Maybe you will one day see the endpoint, maybe you will not.. but it should be the journey of discovery that matters.. of which at least you will believe you finish strong..

Hmm as for my lost post, I gather maybe it is destined to be not posted (fatalistic attitude mah hahahah). But I will definitely figure out how to swim out to the ocean bah...

内心的自由

Rewatched 将爱情化为行动 and remember the freedom speech

但是如果没有内心的自由
就没办法体会到人生中许多美丽的事物
就像自助旅行一样
只有自由自在的走着
才会发现到别人所看不到的美景

What exactly is internal independence?
Hmm is it a hermit's way of finding peace? Like the Monk who sold his Ferrari? (I haven't finish that book either too.. oops!)

Lately World Vision was asking for people to help educate the woman saying through education, woman will marry later. Actually I do wonder if that is a good or bad thing. Just as I do wonder if woman being too independent and headstrong is good for marriage or not. There was this article in this month's Her World about a lady who decided to call off her engagement because she felt she just wasn't ready. She said if she had been more dependent, he would probably be the right guy.

Will she ever felt this eternal regret like how 中山龙和珍珠在《命中注定我爱你》 felt? But then if the guy moved on, then I guess probably not. Perhaps, that is the problem with educated girls. They cannot be submissive wives anymore. But whether it is good or bad is entirely subjective.

Actually everything has its pro and cons. And I guess I do want this 内心的自由. At least, I believed it will let me find my true self.

在自己婚禮前，竟遇見了可能的真愛

在自己婚禮前，竟遇見了可能的真愛

a)放棄一切，追隨真愛而去...
b)向真愛表白，如果對方接受，拋棄婚禮，遠走高飛...
c)向真愛告白，但還是履行原本婚禮的約定...
d)放棄追尋，繼續原來的結婚計畫...

Want to know what the poll says? Click kokoro site to find out.

I can only say, people are too romantic... or maybe is kokoro followers are too romantic... and idealistic. Someone once said I'm an idealistic follower.. asking for the impossible.. for the perfect love.. And too stubborn for my own good...

But if love equates to marriage which equates to setting up a family, why do people alwaz tell me they want to delay having a child first?
And if you do not want to set up a family, why is marriage necessary in the first place?
And if you do not want to get married, then are you in love in the first place?

Which brings me back to this question, if you had loved, why do you falter at the wedding eve? Pre-wedding jitters may be acceptable. But forsaking the significant other at the wedding altar to seek what you deemed is real love, then in the first place, why did you marry?

Seems like it has been a long time since I watched kokoro series. Decided to try my luck .. viola.. a new series - 雪萤之舞. Fireflies aka 黑暗中的小天使, still remember YY3J1 fireflies scene. Hmm... Oh and I realise that after FTL, I kinda fell in love with 闽南语.. 忽懂忽不懂的感觉，觉得好奇妙。。。

Watching via this site.
Episode 1
>>Note the elder was asking why youngsters all don't get married, then old already how? That was a question I asked myself a few weeks ago. At first I thought of finding my friend and maybe buy a condo together. But before I even discuss with my friend, I thought over the fact that if death should occur, there would be troublesome matters e.g. estate duty etc. So maybe a nursing home would be better for me. At least after death, not much paperwork needs to be done hmm...

Episode 2
>> 雪萤 = Winter fireflies? She was saying fireflies not only come out in autumn but also in winter. But she said not much knowledge is uncovered about winter fireflies also known as diurnal fireflies (I did not research haha.. too lazy "p)

Episode 3
>>相信幸福，就能看到光芒。。

Episode 4
>> Managed to find the finale here...
女人傻起来，真的很傻。。。

雪萤。。 突然好像看雪萤。。 还是先看夏天的雪先吧! 加油！

Perfectionist pattern?

Perfectionists are systematic, precise thinkers and workers who tend to follow procedure in both personal and business life. Extremely conscientious, they are painstaking in work which requires attention to detail and accuracy. Perfectionists desire specifics on what is expected, how much time is required, and how the work will be evaluated. They can make major decisions but may be criticized for the time span they require. In particular, Perfectionists bog down in details in the decision-making process. Although they like to check out the opinion of their supervisors, Perfectionists do take risks when they have the facts and can interpret and draw conclusions. Perfectionists want reassurance and personal attention. However, they have been reinforced early in life in terms of how well they do things, not for who they are. They tend to react to personal compliments with the thought: "I wonder what this person wants!" Acceptance of sincere reinforcement for who they are can increase their self-confidence.

Was once again tidying my credentials folder when I saw this personality test I did a few years ago. Looking through my report slips and aptitude tests I did in the past, I do wonder if I failed these teachers.

"individuals who have clear thinking and excellent observational skills. They are able to form comparisons and reason by analogy with a consistently high degree of efficiency."

And look at what I have achieved over the years. Nothing great, nothing remarkable, nothing worthy to mention haha.

Maybe is my individualistic character.

"Would increase effectiveness with more role flexibility; independence and interdependence; belief in self as a worthwhile person in their own right."

Hmm too self-righteous pig in my humble opinion. Wahahaha!

End of the day, while I'm glad all these teachers who constantly praise me as a student who will constantly puts in efforts to improve her grades (and some who request me to take special note of my mother tongue and physics).. I have to say I disappointed most of you as I'm pretty laid back lately and would prefer to live life to my fullest by playing as much as my body can haha. It had been fun looking back at what I used to be then… hmm actually I was quite playful in the past too with lots of ecas.. but I probably hid it from them hahaha.

And yes, I decided no man is an island, but I'm a woman. So instead of keep asking people if they are interested in this or that… I shall just plan on my own as per norm. Back to the same old principles, if time + cost ok, I'm ok! Let fate decrees!

The Mechanic

You are lucky because you have the ability to be good at many different types of tasks. You introverted and thinking style lets you concentrate and focus on solving problems. To be the happiest, you need to have a career with a lot of independence and autonomy. You hate to be micro-managed and will do best working for yourself or in very flexible environments. Your natural interests tend towards using your excellent reasoning skills and love of facts and data to find solutions to practical questions.

Some of your personality traits include:

* Interested in how and why things work
* Do not function well in regimented, structured environments; you will either feel stifled or become intensely bored
* Constantly gather facts about your environment and store them away
* Ability to use logic to understand "how things work"
* Learn best "hands-on"
* Usually able to master theory and abstract thinking, but don't particularly like dealing with it unless you see a practical application
* Action-oriented "doers"
* Focused on living in the present, rather than the future
* Love variety and new experiences
* Highly practical and realistic
* Excellent "trouble-shooter", able to quickly find solutions to a wide variety of practical problems
* Results-oriented; you like to see immediate results for your efforts
* Usually laid-back and easy-going with people
* Risk-taker who thrives on action
* Independent and determined - usually dislike committing
* Usually quite self-confident

Some of your suggested careers are:

* Police and Detective Work
* Forensic Pathologist
* Computer Programmer, System Analyst and Computer Specialist
* Engineer
* Carpenter
* Mechanic
* Pilot, Driver, Motorcyclist
* Athlete
* Entrepreneur

Bflygal's comments:
I knew I should have gone forensic.. darnz! Although I have to admit thankfully I'm in this company.. way too much independence that I am kinda abusing it hahahha..

More Petronas Ads

After watching the beautifully imperfect ad, I kinda forgotten about this talented director - Yasmin Ahmad.. till I saw this

Rich son, poor son


You can see the envy of these 3 ladies.. so sad...

So I went to search for more Petronas ads e.g.





Like the part "She was described as a good, steady student... but slightly naughty at home .... "
haha

For some fun.. let's have the F1 ads



A malay boy speaking german to his father


and a german boy speaking malay to his grandfather

The power of technology... really cool. Reminds me of the stuff I'm currently reading "The world is flat"... should be finishing it soon...


Another sad ad


a father's love gave him wings...



A parent's love is always one-sided
- Translated from Kdrama "Precious Family"

How true.


A blessing in disguise?


"Funny how one moment in the present can tell you 40 years in the past..."
"The total cost of raising you... no charge.. because I love you more than anything on earth"


"sometimes i wonder why is it so hard to ask for forgiveness from the people you love the most"




"爱可以化敌为友"

These should be all done by director Yasmin Ahmad though I'm not sure. Some had comments which credited her. What is sad though is she had departed the world and with it, I wonder will I ever see such highly crafted ads anymore. In these ads, multi-racial was felt, was seen, was heard. I really loved her style.

I think I should stop.. an hour plus of non-stop petronas ads..

Quotes of the week

有人说恋爱要找自己喜欢的人，
结婚要找喜欢自己的人，
都是片面的。
恋人不喜欢自己有什么可恋的？
老婆自己不喜欢怎么过一辈子？
- 云端天籁/马蹄达达辑

不管多大多老，
不管家人朋友怎么催，
都不要随便对待婚姻，
婚姻不是打牌，重新洗牌要付出巨大代价。
- 云端天籁/马蹄达达辑

不要为了负责而去结婚，
要知道，
不爱对方却和对方结婚是最不负责的。
即使当时让对方很伤心，
但是总比让他几年甚至一辈子伤心强。
- 云端天籁/马蹄达达辑

不要为了寂寞去恋爱，
时间是个魔鬼，
天长日久，
如果你是个多情的人，
即使不爱对方，
到时候也会产生感情，
最后你怎么办？
- 云端天籁/马蹄达达辑

拖鞋理論

吳淡如說：我真的覺得，女人尋找適合的男人
就像是尋找一雙適合的鞋子
在年輕的時候，女人買的往往是最華麗
最能墊高自己高度的鞋子
或許是高跟鞋、或許是恨天高
即使難穿也沒關係
因為妳覺得妳自己可以忍耐

但是，如果有一天
妳忍耐到拇指外翻、腳起水泡
妳才會發現，鞋子最重要的功能
其實是要陪妳走路而已
而走路是要往前走的，不是要站在原地的

婚姻就像找鞋標準一直在變
所以，這時候妳就會去找一雙很舒適的
會保護妳的腳的、會陪著妳一起向前走的鞋
而不是去增加你的高度，因為妳就是這個樣子

吳淡如說：「但是這其中也有一個前提就是妳也不能找太醜的鞋
因為如果太醜妳就不會喜歡它」
婚姻其實就像每個人在找鞋而已

祝福大家都能找到一雙適合自己 . 很舒服 .能走長久的鞋 .
若是鞋子已經穿在腳上.可能不太舒服 ...也不太好走 .....
我的想法是...
不妨多忍讓一下 .多協調一下 .試著走一段時間 .....
經過磨合. 調整..... 穿起來自然會舒服些..

如果... 不能舒服些 ...嘿嘿 ....要踢掉 ..要換鞋 .. 要光腳 ....由你決定囉!

>> Hmm was thinking of the phrase I wrote a while back.. shoes, feet, feet, shoes.. 換鞋? 光腳? 光腳? 換鞋?