Amber Light

You really don’t know much about the sweetness that life has to offer.
I want to take things easy at the amber light instead of coming to a halt at the red light or going full-speed at the green light.

<<Oh My Venus / 오 마이 비너스>> 

I wish I am at amber light now too. But maybe I have been on amber light for the last few years.

So since Dec 2015, it has been green light and I have to keep driving. Even though I'm so tired. That I only slept less than 5 hours a day for the last few days. That I nurse a headache. I kept driving. Driving myself to finish <Return of the cuckoo>. To understand why and what. To realise that Chu Ge Ge resemble Doc so much. To miss Doc's way of living. The naggings. The actions Chu Ge Ge took.

I always believe that everything happens for a reason. When I saw this last friday, I was shocked. I had reached the last episode of the drama then. I had been depressed for a few days, partly cos I need to submit my R on Sunday. Decided to go Crown to catch the CNY deco and watch my colleague play poker. Who knows I ended up lending a ear and hearing a sad tale. And seeing this phrase "祝君好运". I always wonder why the female lead name is 君好. And what does the song 祝君好 means. Aas her favourite song for so many years, I only know it today, what it really means to her. It saddens me to know that perhaps, I hardly know her.

Maybe I'm like 君好. I cannot decide. So I let GA decide for me. In a way, I let circumstances decide. But in a way, I feel that is because I just take one step at a time, letting the puzzle unravel before putting the next piece.

Sometimes I wish I can go to the future and see what's it like. Then decide on the present what should be the steps. But this isn't like a novel where I can read the ending first and then go back to the middle. But everybody keeps asking me what is my next move. Is not that I didn't. But sometimes one cannot rush the follow-ups either right. Alot of times, my actions impact not only myself but others too. So it cannot be just me making all the decisions.

Just like I keep WA someone that has blocked me, all I can do is just wait... and perhaps blog this entry in hope to understand why....

p/s: I got an answer why even before this blog is published. Such is life...
So on such a life day.. I wish such a person to have the best luck in such a future...